It�s so quiet here it�s almost scary. Not silent, mind you... we live too near a freeway for that. But I�m experiencing a rare moment in which not only is our neighbor�s bass not thumping through our walls, but there are also no kids screaming up and down the halls and no maintenance men out in the complex common area noisily mowing grass, whacking weeds, or pumping out the swimming pool. Even the geese are quiet for a change. (Wish I could have said the same at 6 a.m. today. What the fuck do waterfowl have to be so upset about at such an ungodly hour anyway?)

And for a rare treat, the Evil Childe and the Boy are gone for the day. Apparently the Boy�s dad works part-time at an amphitheater and was able to get free tickets for the kids for an 80�s �hair band� they�ve never heard even heard of, but they were dying to go anyway. Having come of age in the 80�s myself, I�VE heard of the band and I think they�ll have a rocking good time, in a cheesy sort of 80�s way. Even though I�m a little nervous about letting her go to a big event �alone� (meaning without mom) I think she�s in good hands so I�m going to try to relax and enjoy the time off from hearing the loud music and TV and obnoxious shrieking and swearing that usually leaks out of her room.

Speaking of obnoxiousness... yesterday, in a tongue-in-cheek reference to the Prince �winning� $10 in some online email scam, I was within earshot of the Evil Childe when I joked, �Boy, I�ll bet you just creamed your jeans, didn�t you?�

This kid, who practically from birth has sported a mouth like a mule-skinner mated with a sailor, looked at me in total shock and said very seriously, �Mom, that�s the GROSSEST expression I ever heard!� (I always thought so too, and it�s not one I generally use which would explain why she never heard it before.) I couldn�t help laughing like an idiot when she said, �It�s pretty bad when I�m 15 years old and I hear more disgusting stuff from my MOTHER than I do from my friends!� I just love it that each new generation thinks they�re the ones who invented debauchery. When we all know it was MY generation. Sex and drugs and rock �n roll.... yeah!!!

Speaking of alcohol... well, ok, I wasn�t actually speaking of alcohol but I just reminded myself of all the time I spent fucked up as a youth which inevitably was due to alcohol since I wasn�t a drug person at all (except by marriage. My first husband was a HUGE pothead, and he�d get all cranky and mean when he was out of dope and so naturally my favorite sport was seeing how much more irritable I could make him. Calling him Drugless instead of Douglas was MIGHTY effective, I discovered.)

But ANYWAY... last night we went out with our friend A. who rode the train from the city all the way out here to the rocking suburbs to have supper and go see The Matrix Reloaded... which was EXTREMELY cool, reviewers be damned!! And I was reminded once again that the good thing about not drinking very often... is that you can get fairly fucked up on two strong Margaritas. And that it�s fun to go into Home Depot fucked up and giggling and making crude jokes about the hand-held shower massagers within earshot of the orange-vested salesperson.

Just a couple of Margaritas and I�m all giggly and relaxed and horny and happy. Why can�t life just be like that naturally? Or would it really be so bad to just stay drunk all the time? (Other than the fact that my husband wouldn�t take me out in public anymore, I mean?) Well, at any rate, I think I�d like a little more alcohol so on that note, I�m off to the liquor store to buy me some liquid happiness.

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Last Five
Crappy job crap, weird neighbor, and someone whose baby I apparently want to have - 2006-05-08
Live from the dump - 2006-04-09
Kind of like a muzzle for your brain - 2006-03-29
...and then she fell ass-first into my cereal bowl - 2006-03-28
Playing catch-up - 2006-03-27

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