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Stuff and nonsense

2005-04-10 - 12:56 a.m.

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It�s been a long-ass week, truly. The fun started Monday night. The Prince has been working 60-hour weeks for the past few, and Monday was the first night in ages he�d been home at a decent hour. I came home from running errands at that evening at 9 o�clock and found a note stuck under our door: �Attention all tenants: Our maintenance crew will be conducting inspections of the [broken] intercom units in each apartment during the week of April 4-8. Unfortunately, we are unable to schedule appointments or estimate what day a crew member will be inspecting your unit, but when work has been completed in your apartment we will leave a note notifying you of the visit and whether further repairs will be needed. Blah-blahbidee-blah-blah��

This was 9 o�clock ON April 4�meaning they could conceivably be going to enter our filthy, cat-infested apartment the very next morning. So guess whose already exhausted asses had to stay up til the wee hours cleaning? Yeah, that was fun. Since we�re on the first floor I was pretty sure they�d catch us the first day, so on Tuesday we locked all the cats up in our bedroom before we left for work. Came home Tuesday night, there was no note saying maintenance had been there and intercom still was not working. Repeated the process on Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Grew increasingly annoyed.

The cats are pissed. They hate being locked up in the bedroom. I am pissed. I hate having them in there. I don�t usually let them in because I don�t want cat hair all over our beds, nor barf, hairballs, crumbs of food and litter and god knows what-all else all over our carpet, nor the foul, gag-nasty smells of the cat litter and cat food anywhere near anyplace from which my delicate nose has to suck air. That I@ms catfood-crap is STINKY. The piss and shit smell produced by one day�s worth of box usage is BEYOND stank-ass nasty.

So this means that maintenance may or may not be planning to show up sometime next week. If I�ve got workmen in here on Tuesday, the day I took off work to recover from my surgery in peace and quiet, I�m gonna be even pissed-offer than I am now. Or pissed-er off. Whatever. I believe I may actually try sending them the fuck away if they show up then.

Anyway. I�ve talked to umpteen hospital-type people this week about my surgery, and jumped through multiple hoops. I didn�t find out until Thursday that I needed bloodwork, the sooner the better, she told me. So I spent Thursday night at the urgent care getting that done, and got poked twice by a newbie phlebotomist for my trouble. Then Friday I talked to yet another pre-registration person who told me they needed the films from my ductogram. Fine, I told her, I�d been planning to bring them in with me on Monday per my surgeon�s request. But oh, no, that simply would not do. She insisted they needed the films 48 hours ahead of the surgery. So instead of making the 40 mile round-trip to pick them up from where they were done on Saturday as planned, I had to go there on Friday after work so I could rush them to the other hospital�the surgery hospital�on Saturday.

So here was how my Saturday played out:

Up at 5:30, shower, leave house at 6:30 to get cats to vet by 7. (Casey to get his ugly-ass smelly matted fur shaved off, and Lunama Tuna to be declawed and spayed. FINALLY. And not a moment too soon� she was about due to come in heat again any day now.)

Dropped off cats and left the vet by 7:30 to drive half an hour north for 8 o�clock dentist appointment.

Spent first half hour of appointment having teeth cleaned and scraped. Next two and a half hours having recently root-canaled tooth filled, drilled, sanded down and fitted with a temporary crown. The dental project from hell is nearing the end. Whooooooo!

Then me, my throbbing gums and my aching head drove 20 minutes to the surgery hospital with my films. Tried to drop them off at the surgery department. They had no clue why I would be bringing my films there. They sent me to pre-registration. They had no clue why I would be bringing my films there. Told me they normally tell people to bring films with them the morning of surgery. (Huh. THAT plan sounds vaguely familiar�) But, the woman on the phone had INSISTED I bring in my films on Saturday. So the women in the department began discussing amongst themselves what should they do, they could take my films but where would they put them, didn�t want them to get lost after all�

Meanwhile, I pulled out my cell phone and called the number that was given to me by the woman who told me to bring in the films in the first place. It rang and a woman said, �this is Kathy, may I help you?� Not entirely coincidentally, a lady in the office where I was sitting uttered those exact same words, at the exact same time. So that turned out to be very helpful. Snort. In the end the pre-registration gals were willing to take my films from me, but at that point I thought not. I decided to just hang on to them rather than hand them over to some yo-yo who would almost certainly have stuck them in the dumbest and least obvious place possible, never to be seen again. The doctor is the one who wanted the films after all, and� uh� I�m pretty sure I will be seeing her on Monday. You know, when she goes to CUT MY BOOB OPEN. Seems to make a lot of sense to just keep them with the boob, no?

So that was kind of a wasted trip, but kind of not, because at least now I know how to get where I�m going on Monday and where to park and all that.

After that I took my starving self to lunch at Ch!potle. Chewed carefully on my shiny new temporary aluminum tooth crown while wondering if my blinding headache might be the first sign of the aluminum going to my brain and giving me Alzheimers. (Prince-ly quote of the day: �So all those people who believe that using aluminum foil causes Alzheimers� what do they make THEIR little hats out of?�

Had a 20% off coupon, so after lunch I ran to Bed, B@th and Beyond to buy a nice set of cotton sheets to replace the flannel ones currently on the bed. Spent more money than I care to think about on sheets; a body pillow, which will hopefully finally allow me to achieve a position in bed where my back is comfortable and my arms are not falling asleep (a position conducive to SLEEP, I mean;) and many miscellaneous toiletries which hopefully will magically render me stunningly attractive.

Came home to discover that maintenance still did not come to inspect intercom. Fumed because now I can�t put the nice new sheets and stuff on the bed like I wanted to, since the cats will have to be holed up in there for who knows how many days longer.

Went and picked up the Case-man at the vet. Laughed and laughed and laughed. They gave him a �lion cut�� shaved him down practically to the skin except for his big fat furry head, a big poofy ball at the end of his skinny, naked tail, and a set of four tiger-print fur go-go boots. He looks totally gay. Thomasina is horrified. Every time he comes near her she hisses at his tail.

Also� remember the Seinfeld episode where Elaine finds out she has a note in her medical chart labeling her as difficult? The Case-man has one too� they have him noted as being �cranky.� Well who wouldn�t be, with a haircut like that?

There were a couple of bright spots in my errand running today. I went to Wal-Fart this afternoon� god help me. Pulled in just as the Marilyn Manson song �Mob Scene� came on, and damned if it wasn�t one too. It seemed that every-fucking-body in Illinois had converged on this one scuzzy little Wal-Fart out in the suburbs. But I fought my way through the crowds, searched high and low and found the ONE LONE PAIR of my favorite Earth Shoe sandals they had in my size. I missed out on them last year, much to my disappointment; and even though I dropped a hundred bucks on a pair of Birkenstocks instead, they just weren�t the same. The Earth Shoes are the most comfortable sandals for walking I�ve ever had and I dearly missed them last summer while shuffling along at the zoo with the Birks making big blisters on the balls of my feet.

Then I went to L@ne Bryant and found me some really cute stuff. Three cute summer shirts: a green and turquoise striped cotton, a silky black one with a low cut, sequined neckline and a beaded and bejeweled floaty green silk. Two skirts: a gauzy black and white print, and a silky black and pink print that looks adorable with the black blouse. A basic pair of denim capris. And some cute summer jammies� a silky black tank top with red cherries printed on it and some matching shorts. Even with the coupon I had I spent a shitload of money, but it�s so seldom I can find stuff I really like I figure I better get it while I can.

So, it was a busy-busy day and super-productive, never mind the unnecessary trip to the hospital. Which is good, being busy keeps me from obsessing too much about Monday. Every time I am tempted to panic I have to remind myself that this time I�m going to have to walk myself into the hospital under my own power. I�m a little too big to be carried in kicking and screaming like the last time I had surgery� a tonsillectomy when I was five. Well, actually, I guess the last surgery was my c-section when I birthed the Evil Childe out into the world. (Yeah, she�s always been difficult.) But at that time I wasn�t kicking and screaming not to have it� it was more like crying and begging to get it started. I wanted that anesthetic shot in my back like nobody�s business. I�d have given the anesthesiologist all my worldly possessions, my firstborn child and the blowjob of his life if that�s what it took. Just give me the fucking needle, man. Just stick it in me, baby, and make it all better. Yeah.

Anyway.

Things that made me happy this week:

A two hundred dollar refund from the guy who did my root canal. My Evil One�who, much to my happiness is taking a photography class in school and doing really well�is getting her new camera tomorrow. Yay for dental insurance that pays!

Dandelion perfume from Demeter. Smells just like summertime.

Clear nail polish with a touch of subtle, iridescent sparkle. My nails look pretty!

A movie theater in a nearby town that brings you food and booze while you watch the show� and it costs no more than what you�d pay if you had dinner and drinks somewhere else. The movie-watching experience is vastly enhanced by the addition of comfortable seating, a table on which to set your stuff, and a bitch-boy fetching munchies and beer.

Sin City. Just an awesomely cool movie. I recommend seeing it with beer if, like me, you find you are generally disturbed by violence in films. I don�t, however, recommend seeing it while eating barbecued pork. Shredded flesh swimming in a bright red sauce hit just a little too close to home with this movie.

Chuck Palahniuk. The �Fight Club� author. I just read �Diary� and liked it so much I started reading �Choke� the very next day. �Survivor� is next on my list. Dude is funny and smart and very, very weird and disturbing. What�s not to love?

Guess that�s all for now.





Reading: Choke by Chuck Palahniuk
Listening to: Lest We Forget: The Best of Marilyn Manson
Thinking about: Guess


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Previous - Next

Last Five
Crappy job crap, weird neighbor, and someone whose baby I apparently want to have - 2006-05-08
Live from the dump - 2006-04-09
Kind of like a muzzle for your brain - 2006-03-29
...and then she fell ass-first into my cereal bowl - 2006-03-28
Playing catch-up - 2006-03-27





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