It's been a tough week on the Beach, but I got up on the scale this morning to see a six-pound loss. That makes up for a lot of suckage in the "what the hell can I eat?" department. Can't say I see or feel a difference in my clothes, but hopefully that will happen soon enough. I haven't even been exercising. Although I've been thinking about it real hard... maybe that burned off a few extra calories.

We watched The Butterfly Effect over the weekend. Not the best movie I ever saw, but entertaining enough and certainly interesting. We watched the director's cut on the DVD with the "shocking alternate ending" and although it was kind of shocking, I liked it a whole lot better than the theatrical version ending. Although they don't allude to it at all, it still gives you some idea of what the (now dead) crazy father might have had to do with it all. Wonder if there will ever be a sequel? Or prequel... hell, I guess it wouldn't matter what you called it in this case since the normal rules of time don't apply.

The kind of cool thing about the movie to me is that it is kind of like the opposite of "It's A Wonderful Life." What if, through no fault or malicious intent of your own, your very existence somehow made the lives of everyone around you miserable? If the far-reaching effects of your insignificant day-to-day interactions with others created general havoc and unhappiness for them? An interesting twist on the idea that we affect other people in ways we don't even realize.

Shifting gears in mid-stream, as well as mixing metaphors...

Is it just me, or do other people crave certain colors? Not just like, or favor, but actually crave to the point where a certain color makes you feel so euphoric that you feel like you simply must surround yourself with it?

A few years ago during a wintertime depression I became enamoured of a bright, cherry red color. If I saw something that color in a store, I either bought it on the spot or, if the item was expensive, pined for it endlessly. The color just cheered me, almost nourished me somehow, and I wanted to surround myself with it. The obsession lasted for several months and then faded away as summer arrived and the depression dissipated.

Lately, I've developed an intense longing for the color green. Not just any green, mind you. The color I'm in love with is a bright olive green, the color of the foliage that surrounds you while walking through a sunlit woods. Sadly, it's not a color I can wear well. (Though I'm thinking I could get away with some jewelry... maybe some Swarovski olivene crystals made into earrings and a bracelet? Hmmmmm.... I feel a trip to the bead shop may be in order this weekend.)

The other day, I was doing some actual real cooking, and between the limes and avocados and green onions and lettuce I was working with and the green peppers and asparagus and jicamas in a bowl on the counter, I was immersed in my color-crush and I just had this really euphoric reaction to it. And for once I actually ENJOYED cooking, which I normally kind of hate. Isn't that weird?

Though potentially useful... my only real chance of long-term success on the South Beach Diet is being willing to cook on a regular basis all the stuff we're supposed to be eating. So now I'm all obsessed with trying to figure out a reasonably tasteful and inexpensive way to fill my kitchen with that color, or at least work it into a color scheme somehow. I also seem to have developed a minor passion for citrine yellows and spice orange, so I'm thinking of going that route. My new taste is just surprising to me since I've always been more of a cool-color girl, probably because those are the colors I wear best.

So now I'm on a quest to redo my kitchen. Or actually not so much the "re" part as the "do" part, and the "do" part not even being too awful dramatic, considering we live in a rental and can't really do anything with paint or flooring. And there really isn't much room to set anything, nor much wall space for hanging stuff. But I'll figure something out.

Also I see a major reorganzing and purging of the cabinets and countertops in my future. I have some space on the bookshelves where I store my cookbooks that might be just the thing to hold all the rarely-used shit that is currently, aggravatingly in my way... like the crockpot, the wok, the barbecue tongs, the hand mixer.

It's just possible that maybe I don't actually hate cooking at all... maybe I just hate cooking in the tiny ugly clusterfucked-up space I currently have to cook in?

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Last Five
Crappy job crap, weird neighbor, and someone whose baby I apparently want to have - 2006-05-08
Live from the dump - 2006-04-09
Kind of like a muzzle for your brain - 2006-03-29
...and then she fell ass-first into my cereal bowl - 2006-03-28
Playing catch-up - 2006-03-27

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